Dinner with Thomasina Miers

Sounds jolly intimate, but in fact this was a Cheltenham Literature Festival event, held in a rather splendid Spiegeltent, and we totted up and figured out that the number of covers was around 270. The evening consisted of a three-course chilli-inspired dinner with an interview with Thomasina between main and dessert. The audience turned out to be a mixture of punters like us who had bought tickets, and corporate invites from the main sponsor – HSBC.

The interview was interesting, the creator of Wahaca and first winner of the current incarnation of Masterchef has had an interesting and varied life and career, in and out of the catering industry. She’s had some lucky breaks and clearly moves in circles that are full of connections, but also quite obviously has the kind of outgoing and entrepreneurial personality that grabs hold of opportunities without some of the lip-chewing and not-sure-if-I’m-qualified hesitancy many of us would have. She talks about the epiphany of discovering real Mexican food and then wanting to bring it back to the UK, to challenge the assumption that it’s all cheese-and-jalapeno Tex-Mex stodge. I remember thinking exactly the same thought, easily ten years ago; “why hasn’t someone done anything imaginitive with real Mexican food, like some of the top places are starting to do with Indian?” The difference, I guess, is that I had no idea what to do with that thought; the courage to think “why not me?” is perhaps the most distinctive feature of the entrepreneur.

But enough soul-searching, how about dinner? Interestingly, in her interview Thomasina mentioned that the food tonight “wasn’t as hot as I’d have it.” And frankly, it was a bit of a let down. I’m sure they were her recipes, but the event wasn’t catered by Thomasina or even by Wahaca, it was a catering company out back cooking up her menu. Perhaps that’s unavoidable for 270 covers, but given her comment about the heat (or lack thereof) it does leave me wondering if we weren’t sold a pig in a poke. If you went to an event that advertised Rene Redzepi’s Scandinavian Cuisine only to find it was a UK catering company cooking up some of his recipes, would you feel the advertising somewhat mis-representative?

Anyway, starter was prawn tostadas. Juicy prawns, cooked just right, and very good corn tostadas. The chilli peanut oil actually seemed to be a mildly spiced mayonnaise. The whole thing tasty, but packing little punch. For main course, a beautifully braised piece of beef in a pasilla chilli and prune jus. Again, the fruity pasilla was discernable… but if I have to use the word “discernable” you can see we’re not exactly punching our weight in Mexican authenticity. Sweet potato mash was good, savoy cabbage was just boiled and also completely the wrong accompaniment for the chilli beef. For dessert we had treacle tart with a vanilla cream on top. The tart was insanely sweet, the pastry case really was a case – it might have survived the luggage handlers at Heathrow. And on this course I’m not sure if the word “discern” is even delicate enough for the slightest hint that some chilli might have been left near the tart at some point in its creation.

Yeah, so, the meal was what it was – a corporate lunch in the evening in a tent. I’d still like to try a Wahaca some day, because this clearly wasn’t it, and I’d certainly vote for a branch in Cheltenham – the town sadly has no Mexican options as all (unless you’re counting Chiquitos?).

Review: Number Seven, Cheltenham

I have an irrational dislike of bars, restaurants and cafes who oh-so-cleverly name themselves after the house number they happen to occupy. Gosh! What clever! How imagination! Simple yet style! There’s a whole bunch of them in Cheltenham alone; Hotel 131, 288 Bar & Wok, 81 The Prom, and the cleverly named Number 7. Because it’s at number 7 St James’ Square, see? Tch. They could have come up with a name more relevant to the food on offer… perhaps “East/West”, or “The Globe”, or maybe “Pot Pourri”?

It’s a wine bar restaurant in a very quiet corner of town, very friendly and very local. I picked a starter I’ve never seen on a menu before: chilli con carne. This turned out to be a very rich and warm little bowl of the best kind of English chilli con carne, a nostalgic stab of the 80’s, served with a hunk of bread. Maureen tucked into two neat fishcakes, well constructed and nicely breadcrumbed.

I set my sail for a sirloin steak. Nicely charred it was, but I ordered rare and got medium-rare verging on medium at the ends. The peppercorn sauce with it had zero pep, the vegetables accompanying were cooked well but as plain as veg could be. Maureen’s plate of noodles topped with roast duck in a sweet chilli sauce was much better; good slick duck with plenty of tasty crispy bits, the sticky tang of sweet chilli and noodles beneath. It was a good thing to eat, I’d be happy to have a local Chinese that served this up.

The apple pie with toffee sauce that I finished up with was frankly a bit stodgy and unloved, though at least the sauce was properly done – not sickly. The glasses of wine we had persuaded us that Number Seven is just a wine bar, not a wine-lovers bar (which are so much harder to find!). So, a very reasonably priced meal, nothing wrong with the cooking at all, but simply too uninteresting – the risque chilli con carne starter aside! – for me to want to come back. If you like simple and un-ironically retro then Number Seven might well float your boat.

Review: Onyx, Budapest

Our trip to Budapest was thoroughly gastronomic; breakfast, lunch and dinner every day we looked for Hungarian cooking both modern and trad, and washed it down with plenty of Hungarian wine. That’s a thing that definitely ought to break into the UK market. Tokaji Aszu aside, the same region produces some fantastic, big dry white wines using the same Furmint grape. There’s a lot of good reds too, we had some great specimens made from grapes I’d never heard of like Kekfrankos and Kadarka, generally low on tannins but still plenty complex.

Naturally enough we also add an awful lot of paprika, including wildly varying examples of goulash soup and catfish paprikash. They like their cakes in Budapest too, some good patisserie and in particular sour cherries and plums got used a lot. Apart from our meal at Onyx we didn’t plan any of it, and so naturally we had some great good luck and some duff picks.

Good: a year-old wine bar restaurant called Zona that wouldn’t look out of place in Notting Hill and served up some exciting plates of food; I really loved my slow-cooked wagyu beef neck with parsley sauce and raw ceps. Bad: a fine dining restaurant called Aszu that catered squarely for the well-heeled older tourist and totally failed to execute dishes that lived up to the attractive sounding menu. Onyx was our culinary high point.

Tucked behind and belonging to the venerable Cafe Gerbeaud, Onyx has a pair of nicely dramatic dining rooms with plenty of black and plenty of chandeliers. Our table included two rather incredible hooded black thrones for the ladies. We plonked for the “Hungarian Evolution” menu with a half-dozen courses for about £70. It started with a beautifully clean little dish of pumpkin carpaccio doused in an equally fresh pumpkin-y broth. Never been given raw pumpkin before, so straight away they get

a tick in the “serve me something new” box. And then we were offered bread from a breadboard so magnificently replete with good things that I’ve forgotten most of them. The apple and oat bread was very good, though.

Six great dishes followed, not a duffer among them. The goose liver encased in sour cherry jelly was beautiful, with scrunchy salted almond bits in the other piece. Raw water buffalo was a full-flavoured meat that went exceptionally well with lightly pickled cucumber and a bright vinegary cucumber broth. Brook saibling is a new fish on me, obviously trout-ish, very delicate and with oddly green roe. Their take on goulash soup was a beauty, a stout-dark but crystal-clear consomme with a pronounced dash of paprika over a beef ravioli. The main course of venison was more obvious, with black pudding and beetroot. Good though.

Pudding on the menu was a “21st century Somlo sponge cake” which the table concluded to be a tasty enough concoction but nothing to light a fire with. I went off-piste with an a la carte dish of Brillat-Savarin cheese served with pain perdu and salted almond ice cream. Lovely ice cream, but the tasty chunk of brie-ish cheese felt like it had just leapt off the cheese trolley onto my dessert rather than a thoughtfully integrated element. Wrong cheese for the job, I reckon.

We enjoyed Onyx immensely. The deluxe decor and excellent service made for an occasion, the food lived up to it in top-drawer style, and the Hungarian wine flight was a proper showcase of the country’s best plonk. Service charge and all it was about £120 per person, which compares perfectly well with the same quality back in the UK. Mind you, it’s worth noting that further down the price scale you can eat out very well in Hungary for peanuts. Big thumbs up for Onyx though.

Review: The Oyster Shack, Devon

Our three day walk along the SW Coast Path held an unexpected treat to go along with the stunning views of cliffs and seas and sailing-boat speckled estuaries – some really bloody good food. Perhaps it shouldn’t be a surprise, the South Hams are renowned for soaking up the money of the rich and famous who want a little country retreat not too far from a yacht mooring. But prosperity doesn’t always pair well with good food, so it’s probably more to do with the strong locavore foodie movement down here – let your eye wander across the map and you’ll spot names straight from your local deli-cafe like Luscombe and Sharpham.

We booked a table at the Oyster Shack for our last night as a little celebration, but let me give you a quick whip around of some other good places to eat along the south Devon coast.

The Journey’s End Inn, run now by a chef from the famous Burgh Island Hotel, served us up some no-nonsense big flavours. My courgette fritter was more of a spicy bhajee, but it was a very good one with a neat touch of ricotta whipped with honey. Maureen’s burger was a fantastic specimen – the meat had come from somewhere within a few miles and it was obvious that the lush grass and sea air does the beef cattle some good, the flame-kiss was envy-inducing and they’d kept it properly rare (sssh… don’t tell the health police). My whole grilled mackerel was drop-dead gorgeous, paired up really smartly with crispy bacon and pinenuts. Bit disappointed with the trifle; mountain of whipped cream with some boozy jam sponge below. Note: if somewhat random service gives you a nervous tick, maybe steer clear. And you’ll have spotted by now that I scarcely ever mention service, so.

Sailor V in Salcombe is a new cafe and kitchen (perhaps only doing evenings in the holiday season?), and they do a great coffee. Maureen’s evening meal was a pan of scallops, black pudding and chorizo; dead simple, well done, and corals still on the gorgeous local shellfish. My pulled pork was “olde English style” – no sign of barbecue sauce, this was just juicy fibres of pork served with sweet apple sauce, sauteed new potatoes and a creamy slaw.

And a cheerful shout out to the Rose & Crown in Yealmpton – a 100% catalogue-furnished modern family dining pub, but entirely independent, and they put out a really mean lemon sole with sauce bearnaise and an even meaner battered cod and chips with seriously good tartare sauce and a great pea puree (when I say “mean” I mean good by the way, just in case you ain’t hip like me).

Finally, the Oyster Shack! We’d been before. It’s a deliberately ramshackle little joint, cheerfully painted and decorated in strong seaside colours, at the end of a tidal road. Very eerie when we drove away at the end of the night to find the road had vanished beneath the inky black waters… luckily there is an alternative route. They’re here to provide simple seafood and plonk to the jolly tars of the yachting community and they do just that, with smiles and good service.

Maureen started with crab soup, garnished with a Fresh-style crouton (“take ze slice of cheese on toast, drop eet in ze zoop”) and veeeeery good. She also snaffled two fine, small, sweet oysters. I gobbled up an entire bowl of crispy whitebait, disappointed that there wasn’t quite enough aioli. My main course was a whole John Dory, very smartly accompanied by a sauce vierge of fresh tomatoes and capers. Maureen’s was a fillet of sea bass with clams on top of a

creamy wild mushroom risotto. What both dishes had in common was an absolutely perfectly cooked bit of lovely fish. And I have to big up the risotto – made with a selection of some of the species we’d seen growing wild on our walk, rather than the boring default “wild mushroom = dried porcini” that most places fall back on.

We slurped some appropriately crispy white wine, and finished with a tasting plate dessert that included a frisky elderflower jelly with a fat frozen gooseberry on top but was otherwise just a light and forgettable sweet ending. The whole meal was about £35 per head without drinks. It’s a great spot for a seafood supper – tucked out of the way and totally suited to a summery Devonshire holiday. I wouldn’t have minded if we really had been cut off by the tide.

Review: Zucca, Bermondsey

There’s something about Italian cuisine. Those who are attracted to it seem to invariably be attracted to the idea of “peasant cooking”, of taking raw ingredients and doing simple things to them. The price differential in modern Italian restaurants seems to be dictating more by the price and provenance of the raw ingredients than by the degree of culinary dexterity on display.

This is just an observation, not a judgment. Something simple done well can bring so much more pleasure than something complicated that doesn’t quite work. At the same time, I often find myself comparing the bill from an Italian restaurant with the bill from a modern British gastropub where I’ve enjoyed food of similar complexity and deliciousness and noting that the Italian seems to be marked up 20-25%. Presumably because some of the ingredients had to come from Italy?

Anyway, Zucca is one such place. It’s a stylish dining room on Bermondsey High Street, bearing a smart industrial look paired with clean tables and contemporary dining chairs.

The tapas-style starters are simple fayre; tasty deep-fried vegetables, and a dish of braesola and gorgonzola that was a tad disappointing in that the cheese was in the form of a thin dressing on salad leaves. The most successful was a sharing plate consisting of a very fine salty burrata mozarella surrounded by garlicky bruschetta, fine pickled fennel, cumin roast carrots and crisp lettuce soaked in a very spicy/creamy dressing. All good, all simple.

Maureen picked a pasta main; big curled of it with heritage italian tomatoes and squid sauce. The seafood flavour was pronounced and delicious, the pasta had good bite, but it was a very simple dish. My pork shoulder was cooked slow and full of flavour, with beans and almonds and rainbow chard. It was a deeply satisfying bowl of food, the kind of supper you’d want your dear old Italian grandmother to make on a rainy autumn day. If you had an Italian grandmother, of course.

We reached a pretty clear consensus between the four of us. We all enjoyed our meal, and would probably come here again if we found ourselves living in the area, but it was hard to tie up the simplicity of the menu with the prices.